my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
