all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
