come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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