The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
