she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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