Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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