oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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