Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
