How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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