I heard we made out
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
