Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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