we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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