So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
