I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
