that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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