Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist. http://tfl.nu/9a73
  Replies (18) Good night (2198) Bad night (775)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Was it cool?

  (1-904): View more from Florida

  About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Was it cool? (1-904): About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon. http://tfl.nu/28fv
  Replies (31) Good night (823) Bad night (7631)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat. http://tfl.nu/ucz3
  Replies (47) Good night (887) Bad night (6873)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung http://tfl.nu/rtj3
  Replies (48) Good night (13642) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight. http://tfl.nu/vksk
  Replies (42) Good night (976) Bad night (6296)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god. http://tfl.nu/nh0e
  Replies (15) Good night (3195) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening. http://tfl.nu/7ub3
  Replies (11) Good night (1322) Bad night (5855)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home. http://tfl.nu/7njn
  Replies (30) Good night (10628) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  it's like russian roulette but with a penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): it's like russian roulette but with a penis http://tfl.nu/nnes
  Replies (12) Good night (2571) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja. http://tfl.nu/8z0x
  Replies (13) Good night (2413) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having? http://tfl.nu/d7ao
  Replies (36) Good night (643) Bad night (6581)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths." http://tfl.nu/4apx
  Replies (6) Good night (983) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work http://tfl.nu/kpsp
  Replies (0) Good night (750) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember. http://tfl.nu/lmps
  Replies (0) Good night (432) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible. http://tfl.nu/tfjy
  Replies (3) Good night (354) Bad night (853)

Randomize