I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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