Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize