i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
This is the high leading the old right now
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We had sex on a dog bed..
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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