What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
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so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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