I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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