Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Randomize
