Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
