i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize