After last night, I could never be a politician.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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