ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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