I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
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