..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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