You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
