i just wanna soil my oats bro
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
