omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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