You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Don't tell me you're on acid again
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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