Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
