I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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