I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
