friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
