I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
he fucked my hip out of place.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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