Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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