I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
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we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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