please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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