I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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