Acid is not a monday night drug
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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