She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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