reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We need to rekindle our bromance
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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