Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize