Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
