Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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