I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
