We should be called the Road Head Warriors
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
