Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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