we're blogging at a bar
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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