gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
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